XDM Arrived But You Can’t Have It Yet
Posted July 8th, 2009 by Howard TaylerNine pallets of XDM arrived at the Tayler House today. You can’t have yours yet, though, because Tracy and Curtis won’t be back in town to sign pre-orders until next week.
In order to only stock for immediate demand we needed to shift six of these pallets off to our warehousing facility. This meant getting on the Schlock Hotline and calling Jon Krupp, who generously donates a forklift and a truck every time big things need to be moved.
In the spirit of X-treme Dungeon Mastery he brought an X-treme truck. I had never seen one of these before, and I had my doubts.
Here’s a link to the full photo-stream of XDM X-treme Pallet Shifting, including several shots of that lifting operation in progress. I confess… I’m far more nervous around this kind of heavy machinery than I am around firearms. Somebody needs to point a firearm at you to kill you with it, but heavy machinery has a mind of its own.
I’m pretty sure there’s a comic gestating at the end of that last paragraph somewhere.
Speaking of comics, here’s one last freebie from within the covers of XDM: X-Treme Dungeon Mastery. It’s in a chapter about describing the effects of magic…
If you didn’t laugh, that’s okay. You probably lack the reference frame.
If you did laugh, you really need to buy the book.
Explore posts in the same categories: Books, Business, Games
July 8th, 2009 at 7:06 pm
The really cool thing about those trucks is, you don’t really need a forklift. They can leave the whole flatbed behind. Then they can pick up a dump bed and haul rocks somewhere. And and and… You get the point, I’m sure.
July 8th, 2009 at 8:07 pm
So, is there any truth in the rumor that Schlock Mercenary goods are warehoused in Warehouse 13? Don’t bother denying it, we know you aren’t allowed to say.
July 8th, 2009 at 9:17 pm
So, dumb question. Why do you have the pallets delivered to your home rather than to the warehousing facility? And what happens if it rains before you get them under cover?
July 8th, 2009 at 9:57 pm
@tarl: Because we don’t want to live at the warehouse. Scheduling a delivery to the house is easier. Since the pallets are all wrapped in plastic a little Utah rain won’t hurt ‘em. Scrapyard got rained on a little bit – no damage.
But yes, ultimately we’d like actual office + warehouse space with AC and amenities so that all of the shipping and storage happens under one roof.
July 8th, 2009 at 10:21 pm
In reference to the illustration: Ah, good times. Reminds me of Order of the Stick, though there, I believe it was “Evard’s Tentacles of Forced Intrusion.” And the monster wasn’t given the opportunity to surrender.
Man, I gotta start budgeting for this stuff. Three things currently on order from different artists, and XDM isn’t the only thing I want to order…
July 8th, 2009 at 11:08 pm
Ref the Illo: Our group had “Bigby’s Probing Finger”.
I suspect *every* D&D group has a variant of that spell. After all,
anyone with knowledge of strategy knows the action the enemy
fears most is You Pillaging His Rear Area…. >;)
July 9th, 2009 at 4:06 am
(a) You are comfortable around firearms. (b) You are not comfortable around large machines.
I guess you never considered a career with the armored forces then!
Fred Kiesche
Former Sergeant Type
Armor
July 9th, 2009 at 4:59 am
Eeh – I might be mistaken, but your surprise could be because the truck is inspired by a european contraption only recently introduced to the US?
Funny thing about trucks – most of them will never ever go boom on their own – even when heated :).
July 9th, 2009 at 5:02 am
Heh.. the variations of the Bigby’s Hand spells were always in a race with Otto’s Dance spell in the day for inappropriateness and juvenile humor. ;)
July 9th, 2009 at 7:25 am
*drool*
Can some one get me a napkin?
July 9th, 2009 at 9:05 am
@Tuyu
it was fireball, lightning bolt, then evan’s spiked tentacles of forced intrusion
http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0020.html
and i’m a little jealous of the ability to call upon a forklift when needed.
July 9th, 2009 at 10:00 am
Hmm… Talyer’s Forklift of I’m not going to finish that image.
July 9th, 2009 at 10:07 am
@wanderbear: perhaps that truck won’t go boom on its own, even when heated, but it has, on at least one occasion, dropped its bed off to the side catastrophically. It hasn’t ever done that on a nice, flat street, but there’s a first time for everything.
And if you ever need justification for being afraid of heavy machinery, consider the annual fatalities in automobile accidents. Yes, cars are heavy machinery.
July 9th, 2009 at 10:11 am
If you haven’t seen it, you don’t know anything about forklift safety until
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-3993578102572669647
(It’s slow for the first 4-5 minutes; stick with it especially to the last minute. You don’t have to understand German, the first scene is basically “welcome to the job new forklift driver”, after that it actions are louder than words.)
July 9th, 2009 at 12:27 pm
Squidfood: So, that’s why forklifts are so dangerous…
July 9th, 2009 at 1:13 pm
And did’nt you already do a comic about That? Somethin’ ’bout LongShoreMan of the Somethin’?
Howard Tayler Said: … but heavy machinery has a mind of its own. I’m pretty sure there’s a comic gestating at the end of that last paragraph somewhere.
July 9th, 2009 at 8:14 pm
Maybe it means we’ll be seeing the return of the Longshoreman?
Or even better… Maybe… Oooh, I’d better not say. I don’t want to get Jossed. Not that I think HoTay is the type to Joss you just because you happened to tune into his wavelength, but best not to take chances. After all, a little trust goes a long way.
July 9th, 2009 at 8:46 pm
ShadowDragon8685: Well, when the Toughs split up, Kevyn was sent to Credomar.
July 9th, 2009 at 11:05 pm
” o/~ He tried to kill him with a forklift! o/~ ”
(_MST3K_ fans know what I mean. :) )
July 10th, 2009 at 3:18 am
@Howard: I can see some possibilities of applying that argument to other areas :).
July 10th, 2009 at 9:10 am
Glad to see I wasn’t the only one who saw an OotS parallel. First thought I had when I saw that art was “He misspelled Thog’s name!”, then promptly smacked myself. :-)
July 10th, 2009 at 11:34 am
Speaking of things that go “boom” and may kill you in hideous ways. . .
http://pipeline.corante.com/archives/2008/02/26/sand_wont_save_you_this_time.php
Blog of an excellent writer and chemist. I believe the title of the linked article (Sand Won’t Save You This Time) says it all. It’s filed under the category “Things I Won’t Work With.”
http://pipeline.corante.com/archives/things_i_wont_work_with/
Given that this fine man will work with cyanogen bromide when there is no alternative, it makes for an interesting/terrifying read. (Who knew that chlorine trifluoride – ClF3 – was even possible?)
I was reading through the archives of “In the Pipeline” today and thought of Schlock’s current fun with Boomex-smelling maniacs, hence this comment. It’s smart and eminently quotable, and therefore reminds me of Schlock Mercenary. Perhaps Howard can read it some time when he has “free time” (ha!).
July 10th, 2009 at 6:53 pm
Okay, that stuff just sounds stinking cool! You have got to love something that can set steel on fire, or concrete, or even asbestos. That just rocks.
But then, there are those who think I am sick and twisted. This might just be proof of that.
The nice thing about helping to move book pallets is that you get a copy of the book before anyone else.
Yea me.
Now I just have to wait til next week to get it signed, by which time, (if the last few days of burst reading are any indication) it will be well broken in and dog eared in numerous spots.
July 10th, 2009 at 8:15 pm
on a different topic… it is past 11:00 EST, which is when schlock usually updates here… but no update!! PLEASE tell me it is a problem with this borrowed computer, or a time warp, or ANYTHING but please where is the sweet sweet schlocky goodness fix that I crave??
July 10th, 2009 at 11:27 pm
Update machine is broken. Notepad and FTP to the rescue.
I need a more robust automation system.
July 11th, 2009 at 5:28 am
No … you need minions with Notepad and FTP (out of curiousity, which client did you use?). With minions you can take over the world.
July 11th, 2009 at 6:21 am
And minion pays better than “personal assistant”.
Sign me up!
July 11th, 2009 at 7:08 am
Glad you got the comic up! Can you make it so the ‘previous’ button takes you to the 10th instead of the 9th?
July 11th, 2009 at 9:07 am
@Nodnarb17: Yes. I can also change my own oil. Neither of these are things I’m planning on doing myself today.
July 11th, 2009 at 10:16 am
ahhhhh…….
July 12th, 2009 at 11:26 pm
Wallbanger: Gary Larson occasionally named a caveman “Thag” in
_The Far Side_. (”And we call this the ‘thagomizer’, after the late
Thag Simmons….’”)