Blógünder Schlock

If you bought a Rule 1 shirt from me at LTUE, it is possible that the ink was not cured properly, and will wash out the first time you launder it. If you have a problem, please email schlockmercenary at gmail.com, and we’ll either refund your purchase in full, or send you a new shirt at no charge to you.

Everybody else: don’t worry! We’ll be working closely with the printer to ensure that this doesn’t happen with the big batch of pre-orders.

Sandra was photographing my new boots, and found herself quoting Schlock… “For boots like these, I’d grow feet.” They are quite nice.

But let’s backpedal. I love New Rock Boots, but it’s hard to find a good selection of them anywhere. Then I found out that they have a small distribution center in Las Vegas, Nevada, at 804 S Las Vegas Boulevard. That’s about ten long blocks north of where The Strip really gets going, and several blocks north of where 4th splits off to the west.

This photo was taken across the street. The New Rock store is not in the best part of town, but nobody stole my car while I was boot-shopping, and the folks in the baked-potato restaurant where I took the photo were quite nice. The lady at the pawn shop next door had a horror-story or two to tell about her clientele, though, so if you’re looking to boot-shop with an air of danger (only without so much actual danger) this is the place.

The store is nice on the inside. Lots of boots to choose from. Jennie Breeden (a fellow cartoonist, con-goer, and New Rock aficionado) would be happy there.

Anyway, thanks to your patronage, I was able to buy my first new pair of boots in three years. Not only that, but they’re easily the biggest, kickin’-est pair I own.

Here’s an unassuming picture, where my pants are covering all but the business end.

And here’s a shot showing the rest of the story. Oh yeah, baby. These boots go all the way up. (To my knee. Almost.)

I’m wearing them now, breaking them in. If you’re going to be in Provo at Dragon’s Keep this week, you’ll probably be able to see them there.

And now, back to work with me. I spent a week at Comic-Con, and I probably ought to blog a bit about what went on there…

–a report via Sandra Tayler

Howard gets to buy his boots. We did not make as much money on the convention as we had hoped, but we’ll still have a profit even after purchasing boots, so a-shopping Howard will go. Thank you to everyone who contributed in any way. Thank you to the fans who showed up at the convention and raised Howard’s spirits. Thank you to the fellow BLC cartoonists who were there with Howard. This was a particularly stressful and exhausting con and you all made it better.

-a report via Sandra Tayler

Howard is completely without the capability to check email or internet during his stay at Comic Con. I get reports from him once or twice a day telling me how things are going, but the conversations are short because he is really busy and tired. The con is going well. Howard is having fun conversations with cool people. This always makes me a little jealous that I don’t get to talk to the cool people too, but at least I get to hear the stories. However the majority of Howard’s time is spent committing commerce. Our seat-of-the-pants estimate says that we have just about broken even on convention expenses. This is, in part, due to all you wonderful people who are not at Comic Con and have purchased Schlock stuff via the internet. Tomorrow is the biggest day of the con and we have high hopes that Howard will bring in enough that he can celebrate by purchasing boots on the way home.

Howard wanted me to be sure and mention that he does have marker art available for purchase at the con, but you’ll have to ask to see it. There isn’t room in the booth for him to put it on display. The things that don’t sell at the con will end up on ebay later, so the rest of you can have a crack at it.

Howard departed for comic con on Monday morning. According to telephone reports, he had a wonderful time relaxing with fans in Vegas. Then yesterday he drove to San Diego and worked setting up a booth display until he was ready to drop. When I talked to him last night he was both exhausted and discouraged. Things will probably be better today, but he won’t relax until he’s sure that we’ve brought in enough money to cover expenses. He won’t be happy until we’ve made enough money that I’ll allow him to spend some of it at the New Rock Boots store in Vegas on the way home. Howard’s beloved first pair of New Rock boots recently broke in a way that can’t be fixed. These boots have been, and will continue to be mourned, although he assures me that buying a new pair would greatly alleviate the grief.

So if you’re at Comic Con stop by Howard’s booth #1330 and buy a pin or a ribbon or a book to contribute to Howard’s Boot Fund.

If you are not at Comic Con, you can buy a book at our online store.

If you haven’t already purchased the hilarious Schlock Mercenary Strohl Munitions Plasma Cannon Safety Activity Book, that will also help.

If you have something that you would like to advertise to 35,000 Schlock fans, you can bid on the Project Wonderful advertising box to the right. Simply click the link below the ad to get started.

We also have three auctions running on ebay this week. I’ve selected three pieces of marker art that were created as bonus materials for Under New Management. We’re selling images of Jevee, Breya, and Kevyn. Just click the names to see the auctions and bid.

Buy because you want the Schlock, or do it for the boots.

As you may have noticed, we have a new BlogAds sponsor there on the left-hand side. “Life, Liberty, Etc” is a blog for those who, like me, come from the “shoot with both hands” school of gun control.

I realize that some of you will take issue with the peace sign being described as the “footprint of the American Chicken.” Let me take a moment to describe my position on “Peace.” I’m not opposed to peace, and I don’t believe that gun-toting, right-wing, neo-conservatives are opposed to it either. What I’m opposed to is the philosophy that says “War is never an acceptable alternative.”

The freedoms that I enjoy — the freedom to be a cartoonist, to speak freely, and to go to church with my family where we want to — these freedoms all presuppose a willingness to fight in their defense. The peace symbol to me represents a movement that would deny me the right to defend my rights, my liberty, and my family.

I love peace, and I currently enjoy it because rough men and women stand ready to do violence on my behalf. One of those is my brother-in-law, who is headed for the Middle East with the US Air Force. He, and hundreds of thousands of soldiers like him deserve to know that they have my blessing and my undying gratitude.

So… we have a new sponsor. See the pretty woman with firearm and t-shirt? Feel free to click through and have a look at the blog there — the “range bag” link is fascinating, and surprisingly non-political (a lot less political than this post, for starters). Mostly it’s about cool stuff, like taking a handgun to a padlock.

Come on. You KNOW you want to see what happens when you take a handgun to a padlock.

Rob at PureHero.com liked my plug almost as much as I liked my new favorite shirt. He liked it so much he decided to extend a 15% discount to Schlockers — just use the promo code “schlock” when placing your order.

A couple of days ago my “Punisher” shirt arrived from PureHero — these are the guys helping to sponsor your daily Schlock fix with the Blog Ad to the left. The shirt is made out of a very fine polyester mesh (not “big-hole” mesh like gym clothes, but mesh just the same) with a monstrous latex skull on the front.

I’ll sum it up in three words: New Favorite Shirt.

In the photograph here I’ve got a black undershirt beneath my Pure Hero Punisher Crew, and I’m sporting black jeans, New Rock boots, one o’ them Hot Topic black belts, and a 50-year-old dark wool overcoat.

I wore this ensemble to The Movie Trading Company where our Friday night gamemaster works. His boss took one look at it and said something to the effect of “looks great… but you’re not packing are you?” No, my Frank Castle fantasy stops well short of me carrying submachine guns and large-bore assault pistols (to the video store.)

To be sure, Frank Castle would never wear this shirt. It’s too comfortable. Too STYLISH. His shirts need to be scratchy, and full of things like metal filings and dried paint.

Anyway, if you’re wondering whether the PureHero merchandise is worth the money (this was about twice the cost of a regular cotton tee-shirt), I assure you it is. Because, as I said, “NEW FAVORITE SHIRT.”
–Howard