Per the title: I saw Transformers: Dark of the Moon and I'm afraid I rather liked it. There were astronomy problems, physics problems, and the very common problem of sensibly motivating the invading aliens. But I still liked the movie. The only serious problem it had was that it felt too long. Not just "this movie is 157 minutes long," but "this movie is 157 minutes long and I can tell without looking at my watch."
But I had a great time. I can't help but think that if the first Transformers film had been this good I would have liked the whole franchise a lot more. After how miserable I was during Revenge of the Fallen (Working title: Revenge of Having Fallen for Seeing Another Michael Bay Film) I'm inclined to judge Dark of the Moon very harshly, but the more I think about it the less I think it deserves that.
I HAD FUN.
I sat in the back, and I did the 3D thing. The plot made sense and the action scenes (the reasons we go see movies about giant robots fighting) were not merely comprehensible, they actually moved the story forward and had comprehensibly, responsibly-delivered plot points contained within them.
I checked the credits. Yup. Michael Bay directed it. I think he may have actually taken my advice and watched the Paris chase scene from G.I. Joe to figure out how to move multiple characters through crunching metal and speedy violence without the audience losing track of where these people are supposed to be going, and why.
Will I rag on the movie for the astronomy, physics, and motivation problems? Absolutely. But I'll enjoy doing it. I AM STILL HAVING FUN.
p.s. The new girl worked out just fine. Go figure.