Orders Opening Soon! Last-Minute Info!
Posted September 19th, 2007 by Howard TaylerPre-Orders for Schlock Mercenary: The Tub Of Happiness will be opening at 8:00am Mountain Daylight Time (GMT -6) on Thursday. You’ll be able to place your orders at store.schlockmercenary.com, where you can pay with a credit card, Paypal, or print out a mail-order form and pay with Check, Money Order, or Don’t Send Cash Through The Mail.
You will also be able to place and pay for your pre-order (including a sketch edition pre-order) at Dragons Keep, 260 N. Univ. Ave., Provo. If you are coming to Mountain-Con in Salt Lake City this weekend, you can place and pay for your pre-order there, as well.
Please note… we don’t expect to have the books back from the printer until mid- to late- November. We decided to give the $5.00 discount for pre-orders in part because we’re going to be sitting on your money for at least 60, and perhaps up to 90 days before your book arrives. Hopefully that discount takes some of the sting out of the requirement that you be patient.
We know that some credit-card companies only extend buyer protection within a 30-day window. We won’t be shipping product within that time-frame, which may worry you. Without resorting to legalese, here is our guarantee — if there’s anything wrong with your order, we’ll make it right at no additional charge to you. Did the postman leave it in a puddle, or break the spine shoving it into your mailbox? Did you not get the right number of books? Was your book defective? It doesn’t matter — let us know, and we’ll fix it.
If you’re living outside of the United States and have shopped with us before, you probably know that the flat-rate Priority Mail International cardboard envelopes are the most cost-effective way to get your book. If you want a more durable container, there are shipping options for that, but they more than double the expense. My advice: gang up with your friends and buy a bunch of books at once. We can double-box them (little box inside bigger box, with padded fill) for uber-protection.
Here are some rough shipping prices: $4.51 gets the book shipped USPS Media Mail anywhere in the United States. Double that for priority mail or parcel post. $12 gets the book shipped Priority Mail International Flat Rate to Europe (or pretty much anywhere else in the world). Double that for Priority Mail International in a sturdy box. All the shipping instructions are available in the storefront, but if you’ve got questions, please don’t hesitate to email us.
Oh, and speaking of the storefront, it’s going down for a few hours Wednesday while we re-lay the pages. It will be back up in time for pre-orders. I promise.
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September 19th, 2007 at 7:52 am
I can state first hand that that is an authentic guarantee! With my first book, the post office lost it and they sent me another one free of charge! These books are WELL worth the wait and the cost!
September 19th, 2007 at 7:56 am
I might recommend writing “DO NOT BEND” On the envelopes, just so the mailman gets that this is a collector’s Item and that they don’t break spines or bend to a crease.
September 19th, 2007 at 8:14 am
An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, and a spine for a spine? Seems like a practical way to deal with the situation…
September 19th, 2007 at 8:16 am
VikedaL: We have a big “DO NOT BEND” stamp that we stamp every package with. One schlocker found that his postman had actually broken the clearly labeled box over his knee in order to fit it into a rural mailbox — it was more work to do that than it would have been to walk it to the door.
Long story short: if your mail-carrier wants to break your book, we can’t stop him. We can, however, send you a replacement (in the above case, we sent to a different address.)
September 19th, 2007 at 9:32 am
Mid-late November from the printer… feh. I guess I’ll have to wait till I get back to the UK, then, as the timing is going to be really, really bad for me.
See, I’m coming to the USA for Christmas. I leave the UK on 13th December, and don’t go back till January. My options amount to “hope it arrives before I leave so I can enjoy it on the plane”, “wait till I get back”, or “try to get it shipped to my significant other’s house so she can gift-wrap it for me”…
September 19th, 2007 at 9:58 am
McNutcase: if you know where in the US you’re going to be, we can ship it there so your book is waiting for you upon your arrival.
September 19th, 2007 at 10:02 am
Howard: I’ll clear that with the owner of the address, and hope she’s happy to hold my mail for me. Shouldn’t be a problem, and thanks very much!
September 19th, 2007 at 10:05 am
I hve to echo Spudderpillar’s comment. These guys really went out of their way for me. I had some sort of odd order on the first book and they made it work. My copy of book #2 had a chewed spine and they offered to replace it no charge. It’s always been obvious how far they go out of their way for their fans but if you haven’t experienced that first hand, I confirm that it’s great.
September 19th, 2007 at 12:20 pm
I was wondering if there could possibly be an option to pay an extra $5 on the order form to get the nifty Strohl Munitions coloring book. Some of us poor souls don’t have a paypal account, and didn’t feel like opening one expressly for the coloring book (not that we weren’t tempted). But there’s no way we won’t get the comic. We will also stop talking in third person now.
September 19th, 2007 at 1:20 pm
I can confirm the excellent customer service, too. Both times that I’ve ordered books, they have arrived with smashed corners due to rough treatment by either Australia Post or the USPS, and the Taylor Corporation have made it good with replacements both times.
I’ll be upgrading to the hard mailers though, because I feel bad about having them make a loss selling me the product when they already give everyone Schlock for free (and making a profit is the only way we’ll keep getting it… if the kids aren’t able to eat, cartooning wouldn’t be likely to continue full-time)
September 19th, 2007 at 8:05 pm
I, too, would like to see a bound of the Strohl Munitions Coloring Book.
September 19th, 2007 at 8:46 pm
I will add a ditto to being willing to order a couple bound copies of the Coloring Book if you went to the (probably noteworthy) trouble of having someone print and bind them.
September 19th, 2007 at 10:52 pm
hmm,…8 am…makes it 3 pm here….home 2,5 hours later….wonder how low a sketchnumber i will get with that,…..
September 19th, 2007 at 11:48 pm
Well, I shall be by the ‘puter at 4pm local time, 8am already come and gone, another 7+ hours to go.
September 20th, 2007 at 5:14 am
worldminder: sketch numbers are not assigned that way, I’m sorry to say. It’s pretty random, because Sandra sorts all the orders after they come in, and I draw the pictures in blocks of 25 or 50.
–Howard
September 20th, 2007 at 5:33 am
F5.. nothing yet, F5… nothing yet, F5… nothing yet.
Hmm, maybe I started early with pressing F5 ? ;-)
I can only agree with the rest here that theservice is top-notch ! Until now I’ve been lucky that I didn’t need a replacement, but mails were always responded too.
And I second the color book motion. Would be a great addition.
September 20th, 2007 at 5:37 am
Todays strip made me think on another item that would be cool to have: a xinchub stress doll :D
September 20th, 2007 at 6:38 am
Yes I agree that having links to all the ways that Howard can take our money would be great ie. the dragon-cow or is that cow-dragon poster