As Promised, New Merchandise!
Posted May 1st, 2008 by Howard Tayler
The first batch of new merchandise (based on old images, yes, but we’ve found new ways to sell them to you!) is ready for pre-order.
Let’s start with that old standby from January, Rule 37. It is now available as a T-shirt (plain white, or “ringer” white) with a Schlock Mercenary logo on the back. The print process used on these is akin to inkjet printing right on the shirt.
The resolution and color depth is wonderful, and we’ve washed samples with hot water and BLEACH (not that YOU’d ever do that) and there’s no noticable fading. I have a year-old shirt printed this way, and it still looks great fifty washings later.
You don’t want a T-shirt? Okay, okay. Here’s Rule 37 laid out on a mousepad. I know, I know… some of you don’t use mousepads. Lots of you DO, however, because optical mice don’t always agree with shiny table surfaces. The mousepad is printed the same way the T-shirt is, so the colors look really nice.
Tired of Rule 37? I understand. Maybe I can tempt you with “Petey’s Galactic Bath” on a mousepad. It can sit there under your deskrodent as a reminder to not let your sheer brilliance go to your head.
These three items are all on pre-order, and are all going to be printed by the same manufacturer here in Utah in the next couple of weeks. We plan to start shipping things out to you on or around May 20th, but it could happen sooner than that. Or a little later. We’ll keep you posted. Watch this space.
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May 1st, 2008 at 10:10 pm
Yay! My Petey suggestion made it! Do you accept large wads of cash?
May 1st, 2008 at 10:22 pm
I do, in fact, accept large wads of cash. I recommend you mail them in security envelopes to the PO box listed on the store site. Also, it’s perfectly legal to mail cash, and I’m required by law to accept it (that’s what “legal tender” means.)
Be sure to email me with your order number. Since it was your suggestion, after all, we should throw something special in your package…
May 1st, 2008 at 10:35 pm
YES! A T-Shirt! Now, to set aside budget this week to pre-order one. Thanks, Howard! :-D
May 2nd, 2008 at 6:19 am
Ooh, Howard accepts wads of cash?
… This changes EVERYTHING.
May 2nd, 2008 at 7:20 am
“and I’m required by law to accept it (that’s what “legal tender” means.)”
actually….you’re not:
http://www.treas.gov/education/faq/currency/legal-tender.shtml
“This statute means that all United States money as identified above are a valid and legal offer of payment for debts when tendered to a creditor. There is, however, no Federal statute mandating that a private business, a person or an organization must accept currency or coins as for payment for goods and/or services. “
May 2nd, 2008 at 7:21 am
not that I see any sane reason why you wouldn’t…
May 2nd, 2008 at 7:58 am
Whoo! You can jump start the American economy by funneling your tax rebate through Orem, Utah. Who needs gasoline when you’ve got Rule 37? (grins)
Wyatt (realizing that he needs to add another book to the library)
May 2nd, 2008 at 8:46 am
Is this the same shirt printing process as was at Penguicon ‘07? I’ve never dared to wear or wash that shirt.
May 2nd, 2008 at 8:50 am
So, wait… I don’t have to accept cash?
Bah. Your money is good here, I assure you. I like the thought of some treasury agent making sure that if you throw money at me, I have to pick it up and put it in my pockets. If we really HAVE to have big, intrusive government, perhaps there should be an agency of “Howard Must Not Leave Money On The Table.”
May 2nd, 2008 at 8:53 am
dsrichardson: It is the same process, yes. My “Grease Elf” shirt and my “Chaotic Misunderstood” shirt have both been washed numerous times. There’s a little fading, but the image is still crisp and clear a year later, and after at least 20 washings (50 for the Grease Elf.)
We printed some images from Sandra’s children’s book for testing – very finicky CMYK stuff. They came out GREAT. We then washed both shirts in hot water and bleach, and they STILL looked wonderful. We then handed both shirts off to children, who are wearing them and tossing them in the wash weekly.
I’m pretty confident in this product. We’ve been doing our homework on this for a while now.
May 2nd, 2008 at 3:18 pm
As I understand it, the legal requirement regarding cash is for payment of debts. You can demand whatever bizarre form of payment you like for an up front exchange or purchase, but if someone wants to settle an IOU you have to accept cash.
May 2nd, 2008 at 3:59 pm
I am Order #5794
May 2nd, 2008 at 6:05 pm
Okay.
I caved.
Been resisting buying a bunch of stuff until now, but thats it. I must have this tee.
*does not mention the other $100 of stuff purchased, too*
May 2nd, 2008 at 9:17 pm
If the mouse pad is a Wowpad I might go for it. I swear by those these days.
May 2nd, 2008 at 9:44 pm
I think we’ve seen the Grease Elf, but not Chaotic Misunderstood. Is it just the words, or is there a picture to go with it?
May 2nd, 2008 at 10:08 pm
There’s a picture, yes. It’s sort of a green-skinned guy (Orc shaman, perhaps) brandishing a human skull on a chain.
Oh, you want to SEE the picture? I’ll find it at some point. Not sure where I put it, really.
May 3rd, 2008 at 4:23 am
just out of morbid curiosity, is there a full list of the rules? and if so, why the hell isn’t it on a T-shirt??? (er. preferably with illustrative examples… cause, heck, it’s not like you’ve got lots of work or anything…. um… yeah!)
:-)
May 3rd, 2008 at 6:39 am
Bulwynkl: There is a complete list on my hard drive, but most of the unpublished rules are just place-holders. They’re not funny, pithy, or otherwise good enough.
If you check Wikipedia you can find the complete published list.
May 3rd, 2008 at 7:24 am
I would have loved to buy a rule #37 T-Shirt. However, I absolutely hate white T-Shirts. The mousemat will be the envy of my work colleagues though.
May 3rd, 2008 at 12:27 pm
So the “Complete” list is just to make sure you don’t double up on the numbers?
May 3rd, 2008 at 3:57 pm
Hurry the t-shirt is available! Now I have a dilemma, replace the rule #37 poster that my puppy chewed a widdled on or get the t-shirt… or just get both :D