Wednesday March 16, 2005
Book 6: Resident Mad Scientist — Part IV: Old Habits Die Hard

Note: The Cat in the Hat Comes Back enjoyed renewed popularity in the early 28th century with its discovery in an Earth Library by a felino-hominid researcher from Uuplech. The contents of the book made the rounds on Uuplechan networks under the caption "Tell me this doesn't look JUST like my half-uncle Cubbins."

Not surprisingly, Uuplechans found all three live-action versions of Saint Geisel's 1st "Cat in the Hat" book more than a little insulting. Not because of the way the Cat in the Hat was portrayed... no, the movies were just dumb.

Note also that the correct term for 'a missile to be deployed against "anti-missile missiles"' is not "anti anti-missile missile." It's "anti anti-missile-missile missile." You're always supposed to have one more "missile" than "anti," because otherwise nothing will blow up. Granted, this information comes from civilian linguists, rather than from military sources. Military sources would almost certainly be using acronyms instead.

Transcript

NARRATOR: Battlefields in space are curiously crowded places, for as empty as they look.

Missiles, anti-missile missiles, anti-anti-missile missiles, anti-anti-anti-missile missiles...

NARRATOR: Counter-measures, counter-counter-measures...  Munitions, sub-munitions, sub-sub-munitions...

For every weapon deployed there is an escalating hierarchy of responses, and the net result is that an entire volume of space becomes unsafe regardless of whose side you're on.

NARRATOR: It's like that thousand-year old legend about the return of The Cat in the Hat.

Speaking of which... the U.N.S. battleplate that just arrived on the scene could play "Little Cat 'Z'"