Sunday December 14, 2008
Book 10: The Longshoreman of the Apocalypse — Part IV: Fuller's Soap


Narrator: Meanwhile, back in Southport, Dock Two. . .
Kevyn: Pi! Andy! Take three squads to the Sudberg Lock and get ready to start letting the cargo haulers in.
Kevyn: Andy, I want you posted up high, nice and visible, packing two handguns and a carbine.

Think "Dangerous Alien Overlord" and try to look the part.

Andy: Sir, you're turning me into a high-priority target. What am I, bait?
Kevyn: No, you're flypaper. Hostiles engaging you will be tied down at our perimeter, instead of getting in here where the civilians will be working.
Andy: Flypaper. Yes sir!
Kevyn: Ventura! Aardman! You two take the last squad and supervise the loading. The Eatonrun is going to open up, and I want those haulers filled and driving away quickly.
Aardman: Sir. . . I'm stuck.
Kevyn: Stuck? What's the. . . Oh. You've stepped in goober loads. I'll get some degoober for you.
Aardman: Ensign Ventura already checked. Schlock took all the goober supplies to the stationwaist.
Kevyn: Pi! Get back here! I need you to unstick Private Aardman from the deck.
Pibald: Shall we give that nose-job another shot?
Aardman: No thank you. I've had enough reconstructive surgery for one week.