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Ovalkwiki - The Official Schlock Mercenary Encyclopedia
Writing Excuses with Brandon Sanderson, Dan Wells, Mary Robinette Kowal, and Howard Tayler
One Cobble at a Time - the official site for Sandra Tayler's writings
NARRATOR: Kathryn Flinders is firing a Strohl Munitions BH-250 plasgun, or "plasma cannon."
SFX: THOOOM!
NARRATOR: Saying that this weapon "emits plasma" is like saying a star "emits light" or a politician "emits falsehood."
NARRATOR: Kathryn's targets are wearing surplus Pendrake Armory CS-3100 Ablator exo-suits, 8th-gen.
NARRATOR: Saying they "might as well be naked" is like saying they "might as well have stayed in bed today."
(Both statements are inaccurate, though colored with similar measures of irony.)
NARRATOR: These exo-suits offer multiple layers of protection, all cleverly engineered to shunt kinetic strikes and thermal blossoms away from vital areas.
NARRATOR: Unfortunately, the broad wash of nearly-fusing plasma deposits far more heat than the clever engineers at Pendrake Armory expected the exosuit to survive.
Deep bands of superconductors only serve to ensure that the entire suit is too hot, rather than just the front.
NARRATOR: Joints fuse, layers denature, distemper, and become useless.
NARRATOR: The extreme heat will radiate in faster than it can radiate out.
This is called "cooking" and it is not good for living meat.
NARRATOR: But the Ablator suits are so named for a reason.
SFX: ABLATE
Security 1: Great. I might as well be naked.
Security 2: Shouldn't have gotten out of bed today. Nope.
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