Monday June 26, 2000
Book 1: The Tub of Happiness — Meet The Mercenaries


Brad: Okay, so the New Sync Boys are a complex hoax, and we're being paid to cover it up...
Schlock: ...By defending their holograms from disruption by any of their fourteen thousand amourously aggressive female fans.
Sign: Concessions
Brad: All those girls, emotionally trapped. Helpless. Enslaved by a farce.
Sign: Merchandise ??ll caps T-shirts . . . wimples . . . . crisping pins.
Schlock: I feel cold and dirty inside.
Brad: I think that's the 4-liter big-chug you just finished.
Schlock: I'm still waiting for the 2000 milligrams of caffeine to kick in.