Sunday October 25, 2015
Book 16: Big, Dumb Objects — Part II


NARRATOR: Jumpstar Prime...

MASSEY: Today began so beautifully...

I was doing the best work, the most important work any lawyer can aspire to!

I was trying cases in advance by crafting a constitution!

How do you balance restrictions against rights? How do you protect and serve without injury or infringement?

MASSEY: It is an ancient question, posed sharply against the beating heart of every civilization.

It has been answered countless times. Elegance, error, and epiphany shine brightly across the eons.

MASSEY: I could have lost myself in the galaxy's legal libraries for lifetimes uncovering the quintessential elements of legislative alchemy.

MURTAUGH: Then I interrupted your fun.

MASSEY: Not interrupted. Corrupted.

MASSEY: Your dilemma required a solution built upon the very excesses I sought to prevent.

You turned it into opposite day.

MURTAUGH: Relax, Massey. We're letting our police take care of some pirates. Legally, thanks to you.

MASSEY: Legal isn't always enough to let me sleep with a clean conscience.

MURTAUGH: Do what I do.

I lie in bed and tell myself happy stories about all the good things I'll do tomorrow.

MASSEY: What about the inevitable disappointment?

MURTAUGH: I have a fancy pillow filled with hand-polished beads made from the bones of my enemies.