MAIAMUMLA: In the interest of catering to your biological predisposition for haste, I shall move directly to the salient point:
We are going to begin supplying extreme longevity to any and all who wish to be treated.
MAIAMUMLA: The treatment will be provided at no charge. Your handbrains have been updated with the technical details.
MAIAMUMLA: In time, perhaps you will develop a predisposition for patience. For now, however, don't read anything. Just shout questions at us.