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Ovalkwiki - The Official Schlock Mercenary Encyclopedia
Writing Excuses with Brandon Sanderson, Dan Wells, Mary Robinette Kowal, and Howard Tayler
One Cobble at a Time - the official site for Sandra Tayler's writings
NARRATOR: Broken Wind and Cindercone approach Eina-Afa, the Neoafan Freehold system's "Can Full of Sky."
IAFA: Chinook, this is Iafa. We're back, and Cindy brought you a present.
CHINOOK: Just one? I've got an entire world to run here.
I need all the presents.
CINDY: You only get one, but it's loaded.
It's a fifth-generation Tricorn-Class battleplate with three 1100-meter annies and six shipwright-class fabber bays.
CHINOOK: Three annie plants? Cindy, we asked for five.
CINDY: Captain Murtaugh's expedition was underpaid. Sorry, love. We're settling for three.
CHINOOK: Cindy, Iafa... I need more power than that. I had to turn out the lights for twenty-two minutes yesterday just to open a door.
IAFA: What door?
CHINOOK: The axial hatch two thousand klicks west of the hurricane track.
IAFA: I molybonded that hatch shut millions of years ago. You might as well have cut a hole in a wall.
CHINOOK: Cut a hole, open a door, whatever. Cindy can use it to drop off my present.
CINDY: You want me to haul Jumpstar Prime down in one piece? The original plan was to take her apart upstairs.
CHINOOK: "Jumpstar Prime?"
Who gave her that name?
IAFA: It's only temporary. We're taking her apart, remember?
CHINOOK: Hmph. I still need to speak with the person responsible.
NARRATOR: Milliseconds later...
CHINOOK: "Jumpstar Prime!"
Sergeant, it is PERFECT. I wish I had skin! I'd get it as a tattoo!
SCHLOCK: Already taken care of, but I can do a bigger one if you'd like.
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