Sunday February 4, 2001
Book 1: The Tub of Happiness — Bombs Ahoy


Narrator: Big bombs are ticking. Evacuation in progress. T-Minus 4 minutes...
Shep: Into the elevator, people!
Guy in Suit: Hey, women and children first?
Shep: Big, strong, men first. then women. childern go last.
Guy in Suit: But why?! The children are our future!!
Shep: Because this way I can stack them on top of you. Now shut up and brace yourself.
Random Kid: Wheee!
SFX: Stuhff
Narrator: T-Minus 3 minutes...
Uncertain: Admiral, Squad B here. All ships have blown clear.
Breya: Take your squad down on the next elevator, Sergeant.
Breya: Ennesby, can you teraport the top end of the hellevator to safety? We need to grab everything from just above tier 11 clear up to the counter-weight station.
Ennesby: That's a lot of mass... It'll take time.
Breya: I have three teraport units. Can you use them in tandem?
Ennesby: Yup. It'll still take a few seconds to completely 'port, though. And we'll need to cut the Hellevator at tier 11 before the blast.
Breya: And that's why we brought you along, corporal.
Nick: But i dunno how to do demolitions.
Breya: Of course you don't. But the stationmaster does, And I may need you to help me twist his arm.
Narrator: T-minus 2 minutes...
Schlock: The skiff is loaded captain. We're ready to 'port out of here.
Tagon: Kevyn. Are you ready?
Kevyn: Shields are tuned, kitesfear's 'port is keyed for eta carinae... Yes, sir.
Tagon: Brad, 'port the skiff to the far side of luna.
Narrator: T-Minus 25 seconds..
Breya: Thank you for your cooperation, stationmaster.
Nick: You want I should put his arm in the fridge, admiral?
SFX: Bang.
Narrator: Three... Two... One...
Sign: Tier 11
Narrator: Tune in tommorow.