Sunday May 16, 2004
Book 5: The Scrapyard of Insufferable Arrogance — Part II: A Hand of Acey's (CSI Parody)


Narrator: And now, for a discussion of the implications of some inadmissible evidence...
Ozvegan Ryk: Griz, the guy is guilty. His employer knows it, you know it, and I know it.
Sign: Director
Gus Grizzly
Ozvegan Ryk: We don't have all the pieces, but we've got enough to get a conviction.
Ozvegan Griz: You're right. We don't have all the pieces. We don't know the whole story of what went down in that room. And that means we could be wrong.
Ozvegan Griz: You saw the recording. Our suspect was maintaining his innocence in a privileged conversation with his attorney.
Ozvegan Ryk: Lots of people lie to their lawyers.
Ozvegan Griz: Yeah, but this guy, this blob of pathetic suspect... He wasn't lying.
Ozvegan Griz: You broke a couple of laws making that recording, and we can't undo that. You and I now know what he and his lawyer said to each other, and regardless of how the case turns out, we may end up doing a little time for that.
Ozvegan Griz: Do you want our sacrifice to be wasted? Our job is to learn the truth. Let's figure out why Schlock thinks he's innocent. Let's find the real killer.
Ozvegan Griz: All of his friends have turned against him. We're the only people who can get the evidence to speak the truth, and we're the only ones left who believe him.
Ozvegan Ryk: I don't believe him. I still think he did it.
Ozvegan Griz: Now hand over that recording so I can destroy it. I totally do not want to go to jail.