Tuesday December 12, 2000

Note to sensitive, politically-correct readers:
In today's strip, one of the characters uses a 31st-century racial slur, casually referring to a sapient African Elephant (Loxodontus africanus sapiens) as a "Loxie." This slur was not included for shock value, nor is it an attempt by the author to further denigrate this noble, if rather aggressive, intelligent race of Lunar citizens. The author would like to stress that use of this particular slur is offensive our Loxodont cousins, and using it around them is grounds for goring, trampling, and trunk-thrashing.
Book 1: The Tub of Happiness
Bureaucracy Bountiful

Transcript

Tagon:You mean to tell me there are 20,000 people in line here for licenses and permits?
Luna Pedestrian:Yup. It took me 'bout 18 months to get this far.
Luna Pedestrian:I remember back last June, when the line jumped up fast all of the sudden...
Luna Pedestrian:I thought they'd done brung in more help, and we'd be making some kind o' time.
Luna Pedestrian:Turned out a mad Loxie'd rampaged up the steps, 'n took out like a hunnert people... Stomp-stomp.
Breya:That's horrible.
Luna Pedestrian:They died for a good cause. Shaved three days offa my wait.
Footnote:Note to sensitive, politically-correct readers:In today's strip, one of the characters uses a 31st-century racial slur, casually referring to a sapient African Elephant (Loxodontus africanus sapiens) as a "Loxie." This slur was not included for shock value, nor is it an attempt by the author to further denigrate this noble, if rather aggressive, intelligent race of Lunar citizens. The author would like to stress that use of this particular slur is offensive our Loxodont cousins, and using it around them is grounds for goring, trampling, and trunk-thrashing.
Schlock:Today is a very special day. It's the 6-month anniversary of the first Schlock Mercenary strip. It's also the author's brother's birthday. In the interest of familial harmony, the author has decided to make a bigger deal out of the birthday.
Narrator:Hit it, gang.
Entire Crew:Happy birthday to you! See what Howard drew!It's suitable for framing, but the frame's up to you.
Narrator:Okay, get back to work, people. Tomorrow's strip isn't gonna draw itself.
Footnote:That's right, folks... Schlock Mercenary is six months old, and my brother Randy is about 52 times that old. If you'd like to wish Randy a happy birthday, go visit his excellent single-panel comic, Randym Thoughts, and discover things like saving throws against practical jokes, and male-pattern baldness fairies.