Sunday September 24, 2000

Book 1: The Tub of Happiness


Narrator:Behold the Kelrik Hub... current location of Tagon's Toughs, and their ship, the Kitesfear. The Hub is also home to some of the most hard-nosed, thick-headed, anal-retentive FoodService Inspectors in the galaxy.... the K.F.D.A.
Narrator:Tagon's Toughs are here, returning from an eventful evening meal.
Narrator:The Kitesfear is docked here, manned only by her new master chef.
Narrator:Coincidentally, the K.F.D.A. FoodService Commandos are also right here. What fun...
KFDA commando:Arrest him, men, he's been touching food with his bare hands!
Tagon:Hey. How come the hatch is locked?
SFX:Tap Tap
Breya:Where did this 'Condemned' tape come from?
SFX:(Auto-Maim hatch defense system) Swivel
Brad:Why is the Auto-Maim hatch defense system tracking on us?
SFX:(Auto-Maim hatch defense system) Swivel
SFX:(sound of schlock exploding)
Ennesby:Eat Hot Death!!!
SFX:(Auto-Maim hatch defense system) YUMMMBZZZTTHP.
Breya:This horrible. They've blown Schlock all over!
Kevyn:It's not so bad. He'll regenerate. The same thing happened just last week, remember?
Breya:No. Last week Schlock did not get blown all over me. Look at me! This is horrible!
Brad:I found an eyeball! Hey Schlock! Can you see me?
Footnote:According to Benzel's Comic Lexicon of the 31st Century (Harper & Blow, 3116), "YUMMMBZZZTTHP" is, strictly speaking, the sound of an automated defense system digesting hot death. We apologize for any confusion this may have created.