Sunday April 1, 2001

Book 1: The Tub of Happiness
Big Haunted Battleship


Narrator:Appropriately fearful, ennesby flew home solo. Leaving tagon, brad, and sh'vuu to fly the giant, haunted tausennigan warship back to sol system by themselves.
Brad:Captain, I can't figure out the controls. They're all labeled in Tausennigan.
Tagon:Then let me fly her, corporal.
Brad:I didn't know you spoke Tausennigan, sir.
Tagon:I don't.
Tagon:I speak 'Warship' very fluently, soldier.
Tagon:Without Ennesby here We'll have to use the wormgates, so the trip will take us an extra day or so.
Brad:It's funny how outmoded they seem, now that we've been using the teraport for a few months.
Tagon:Well, the rest of the galaxy uses them exclusively, so we might as well slum it on this trip. Besides, what could go wrong?
Ghost In the Pipes:YOU WILL ALL DIE
Brad:Okay, the gargling voice in the pipes is starting to give me the creeps.
Tagon:Just ignore it, corporal.
Shv'uu:Sir, I'm beginning to think it would have been a good idea to bring a squad of toughs with us.
Tagon:Bad idea, sergeant sh'vuu.
Tagon:Think about it for a moment, sergeant. The voice seems to be related to the running toilets.
Shv'uu:Oh. A squad of eight, 130-kilo men on high-protein diets... We'd be listening to that menacing gargle non-stop.
Tagon:No, the men would get spooked, and they'd stop flushing.
Shv'uu:Oh. Now that is scary.
Sign:Juibel Wormgate